Last night at our dinner table, our son told us that a classmate got sent to Mrs. T’s room. Everyone knows that Mrs. T’s room is where the baaaad kids go. You don’t want to get sent to her room. She isn’t mean. You are sent to her to discuss what you did, why you did it and what needs to be done to rectify it. In other words, the child is held accountable. Accountable. So to get sent to her room, anyone that knows you went there, knows you did something wrong. Something bad.
Little K did do something wrong. He hurt the feelings of a classmate. He was being mean. Repeatedly. Apparently he wanted to make sure Little J hear him so he repeated "J went to Jupiter to get more stupider". Are you smiling? I know you may laugh but this is where problems, such as bullying, starts. If it is not addressed, the bully becomes more powerful. We, as adults, know that children can be so honest, innocent AND so mean. So Little K was sent to talk with Mrs. T. It must have been a good discussion because our son said he returned to the room with his head hanging low.
So I asked our son, “K was being a dipper today and not a filler?” Yes, he was a dipper.
Dipper. Filler. We’re talking buckets here folks. The elementary school that our son attends has a Caring Community Council. This council was created to decrease the number of bullying incidents while promoting a caring, friendly atmosphere. The students on the council open the doors in the morning and those that enter are greeted with a smile and a Good Morning greeting. Is there a better way to start the day than on a positive note? Council members also tutor students, they read to students in kindergarten and first grade, and they assist teachers in school-related tasks. Not only do they help others, this council is providing life skills for the council members. They have public speaking opportunities, the serve others and they take their responsibilities seriously. Every year the school has a theme that they focus on. One year they had kindness coins. The coins were to be given to people who the student felt were positive influences in their lives. Caring Community Award certificates were awarded and a Wall of Fame was created in the cafeteria. (Implementation of the Caring Community had positive results – a 46% decrease in behavior reports!)
This year, the schools' theme is “Have you filled a bucket today?” When you walk down the hallway to the cafeteria, there is a huge bucket on the wall. A gentle reminder to be a filler. This council helps send out a strong, positive message to the school and the community. It is wonderful! The kids are learning that it is not right or acceptable to be a bully. Not at school and not at home.
So, you can see, Little K was being a dipper. He was emptying a bucket. Just the opposite of what is expected. The goal is to fill buckets. Fill buckets every day. Do good deeds. Say hello and smile. Help pickup a dropped book or mitten. Be nice to someone.
Life is crazy. We live it. We survive it. Some take it day by day. Is that all life is? Isn’t there more to living? Lessons are so easy to forget.
So, are you dipping or filling today?
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Must be doing something right
The school year is almost half over. It has been a good year for both our children. Our daughter left the elementary school behind as she became a fifth grader at the middle school. The excitement over attending a new school faded quickly. She adjusted well to the new building, teachers, changing classrooms and the homework schedule.
Back to school and my parental bragging rights. Yesterday was our daughters’ first day back to school after her surgery. I knew it would be a long day for her. She was tired by the time I arrived home. She was excited to see all of her friends but not so excited about hitting the books and assignments again. A typical middle school child! We don’t worry much about her as she is self-disciplined (sometimes too an extreme). That doesn’t mean we don’t ask her about her classes, what they are studying, if she has any tests or projects that she should be working on. We are involved and have been since her first day of school. She had a pile of homework but she managed to get it completed before bed time. She also pulled out another, yes, this is her second, Student of the Month award. She has been the November 2010 and January 2011 student of the month. I knew she would make high honor roll again as the lowest grade on her report card was an A. It was a lonely A, and it was the lowest grade on her report card. The other grades, all eight of them, were A+’s. She has set the bar high. Now our expectations are high. The best part, she won’t disappoint us!
Like sister does, brother does also. He has followed her path. At seven, he is reading all the time. He sits in mass and reads the hymnal. He reads, and has started to send, emails. I don’t correct his spelling but if he asks how to spell a word (like recommend-yes, he asked how that was spelled), I spell it for him. He doesn’t want our help. We can only help when asked. I feel like he is shutting the door on me. He is reading a chapter book series. The Magic Tree House series. He reads it to himself. Not to his father. Not to me. Definitely not to his sister. Instead, he wants to know if we can have another reading club night? I cannot say no to that. So after dinner, his sister, him and I, go sit in a room, get comfortable and read. I love it! [Here is proof that reading to your baby from the start builds a great foundation. I am sure the classical music helped too!] The television is not on. Instead, they are exercising their brain. They are developing their reading skills and learning more with every page they turn. He has even spent two mornings before school reading. It is wonderful and rewarding to see them take off on their own, even if it hurts a little. Honestly, I feel pushed aside at times but when they share with me what they have read, I am healed. He is also spelling his way to 100% every week. They have ten spelling words that they are tested on every Friday. He has spelled his way to 100% eleven times. One time he earned a 90% as he wrote a b instead of a d. That happens. He said he should have checked. We make mistakes, we learn from them, we move on. This Friday, there is extra credit (she is testing their retention). I can’t wait to see his test.
So I am bragging that we must be doing some things right. By golly, our children are smart! (and I'm not afraid to tell you about them.)
Back to school and my parental bragging rights. Yesterday was our daughters’ first day back to school after her surgery. I knew it would be a long day for her. She was tired by the time I arrived home. She was excited to see all of her friends but not so excited about hitting the books and assignments again. A typical middle school child! We don’t worry much about her as she is self-disciplined (sometimes too an extreme). That doesn’t mean we don’t ask her about her classes, what they are studying, if she has any tests or projects that she should be working on. We are involved and have been since her first day of school. She had a pile of homework but she managed to get it completed before bed time. She also pulled out another, yes, this is her second, Student of the Month award. She has been the November 2010 and January 2011 student of the month. I knew she would make high honor roll again as the lowest grade on her report card was an A. It was a lonely A, and it was the lowest grade on her report card. The other grades, all eight of them, were A+’s. She has set the bar high. Now our expectations are high. The best part, she won’t disappoint us!
Like sister does, brother does also. He has followed her path. At seven, he is reading all the time. He sits in mass and reads the hymnal. He reads, and has started to send, emails. I don’t correct his spelling but if he asks how to spell a word (like recommend-yes, he asked how that was spelled), I spell it for him. He doesn’t want our help. We can only help when asked. I feel like he is shutting the door on me. He is reading a chapter book series. The Magic Tree House series. He reads it to himself. Not to his father. Not to me. Definitely not to his sister. Instead, he wants to know if we can have another reading club night? I cannot say no to that. So after dinner, his sister, him and I, go sit in a room, get comfortable and read. I love it! [Here is proof that reading to your baby from the start builds a great foundation. I am sure the classical music helped too!] The television is not on. Instead, they are exercising their brain. They are developing their reading skills and learning more with every page they turn. He has even spent two mornings before school reading. It is wonderful and rewarding to see them take off on their own, even if it hurts a little. Honestly, I feel pushed aside at times but when they share with me what they have read, I am healed. He is also spelling his way to 100% every week. They have ten spelling words that they are tested on every Friday. He has spelled his way to 100% eleven times. One time he earned a 90% as he wrote a b instead of a d. That happens. He said he should have checked. We make mistakes, we learn from them, we move on. This Friday, there is extra credit (she is testing their retention). I can’t wait to see his test.
So I am bragging that we must be doing some things right. By golly, our children are smart! (and I'm not afraid to tell you about them.)
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