Friday, October 26, 2012

Give them....


A new coach.  A patient coach.  A coach that can teach young girls how to cheer and have fun.  One that doesn’t yell and belittle these young girls. 

How does one believe shouting negative comments, repeatedly, at the squad will produce results?  This type of action just shuts them down.  They turn off their brains and just go through the motions.

What makes a good coach?

When I think of the coaches I had, I see someone that told me what I was doing wrong.  They’d take the time to show me the correct way to do it. If they had to show me more than once, they did, with patience and kindness. I don’t remember any of the coaches berating any of the students the way this coach does.  If I did something wrong during a game, coach would tell me to shake it off and do it right the next time.  They did not yell at me and ask, loudly, why they were wasting their precious time when I am not doing what they want and the way they expect it. This woman is not coach material. I seriously think she has some issues. Seriously.

Coaches need to care, be respectful, motivate, and teach. They should now the sport and having played the sport is very helpful as well. 

On the flip side, how can a coach devote all her attention to the girls and training when parents are talking and making comments?  In addition to that distraction, siblings are running all over the gymnasium.  The coach doesn’t have a chance to have the girls’ full attention.  I think she yells so she can be heard over the noise. I think some of what she yells is not directed to the girls but to the parents.  She is frustrated and is taking it out on the girls.

I struggle with myself. Should I speak out?  Other parents have.  Some have pulled their daughters from the squad.  Is that the right thing to do?  It would not be fair to Olivia.  She has worked so hard learning her routines and she practices all the time. I hear her clapping after I tuck her in. Sometimes I open her door and ask her to go to bed.  You cannot tell this is her first year cheering. She has had a great season.  She looked so beautiful out on the track cheering for the football team. 

For a youth program, this needs to be addressed.  And at last nights practice, two of the youth association board members came to the school.  What parents were there, discussed the situation and we told to bring their concerns to the next youth association meeting.  I said what I had to last night. We also agreed to stick it out because there is one week of practice left and then competition. 

An experience like this, at any age, can effect whether our children participate in sports in the future. Most of the parents, teachers and community members are supportive and want the best for our youth.  One unqualified “coach” can do more damage than people believe.  We need to keep our youth active and involved.  They will want to return to a sport and try other sports, if they have a positive, encouraging season. Sports teach them teamwork, time management, commitment, and other life-long lessons. 

We’ll stick it out.  Olivia wants to go to competition. I don’t blame her. She has worked hard and deserves the chance to experience competition.  I want to see her compete.  I talk to her after each practice to tell her how well she is doing.  I tell her not to think about the comments yelled at her for two hours.  They are not true.  I know the joy and excitement of cheer has left. It has been gone for some time. This is a shame as I wanted Olivia’s first sport to be a gratifying experience.  It’ll be memorable but not in the way it should be.

Competition is less than two weeks away.  I am looking forward to the peacefulness. 

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